July TransFamily Meeting

I drove up to Cleveland for the TransFamily meeting last night. The most wonderful people were there. I feel so welcomed into that organization. I don’t know where I would be now without it. I owe some dear soul on a psychiatric board I posted on for helping me find that organization, and of course, as always, I owe Erin for waking me up to the fact that I needed this kind of support. I guess when I was friends with Robin, I thought it was just a San Francisco thing. But now I realize that I can never be the same person after having gone through a gender transition with a dear friend. I’m in the same boat with the parents, spouses, children, other family members, and the trans people themselves, and I need TransFamily.

Last night was a very special meeting, because the female-to-male transsexuals were in charge of the meeting. I was always wondering if I’d feel close to them. Well, I do. They are very sweet. Because they were in charge of the meeting, their parents, significant others, and friends attended as well. One female-to-male transsexual is legally married in Ohio to a male-to-female transsexual. Both of them attended. Ohio is one of the states whose voters passed a law that marriage consists of one man and one woman. This has been used to harass trans people as well as gay men and lesbians. A member of TransFamily who legally changed his name and gender to male after a transition was not permitted by the State of Ohio to marry his wife. Everyone is proud that this one couple outsmarted Ohio. The State of Ohio had to allow them to marry, because the man’s birth certificate stated he was female, and the woman’s birth certificate stated she was male!

The female-to-male transsexuals did a fantastic job. We broke into two groups. We sat in a circle and did an exercise where you toss a ball of yarn to someone else in the circle and say something nice about them. You hold onto a piece of the yarn each time. Then that person tosses it to someone else and says something nice. In the end, you have a beautiful web of yarn. We had a mixed group of female-to-male TGs, male-to-female TGs, parents, significant others, and another friend (along with me). The wife of a very elderly man who has decided he is transgender was in my group. He came to the meeting also, and he is very sweet. We are very proud of his wife for accepting him and trying to understand him so late in their lives. We are so proud of the parents who attended. The one right-wing Republican born-again Christian male-to-female transsexual was also in my group. She is really a doll, however, even though we don’t agree on much politically. We really like each other. People said very nice things about me when they threw me the yarn, and it definitely lifted my spirits.

One of my friends who came dressed male last time had the courage to dress in female clothing this time. She really looked nice. I met some new people, and I met one person I had made friends with on the message board. I was very impressed with her.

I really found out this time that I can feel very close to female-to-male transsexuals. There are two of them there I feel particularly close to, because they are both involved in LGBT religious organizations. One is involved in the Lutheran organization. I feel very close to the other one, who is also in More Light Presbyterians and attends a More Light church. He knows Erin personally, so we have a lot to talk about. I think he is going to come to the regional conference in November. This would be a huge relief to me. I feel very nervous about this conference. I don’t feel as accepted in MLP as I do in TransFamily. If someone from TransFamily came to the conference, hung out with me a bit, and attended one of Erin’s events with me, it would be such a relief and would provide me so much support.

After the meeting, I drove over to JimmieLee’s. This was the first time I had met her and Ellie, and their cats, personally. JimmieLee was just adorable, and Ellie was terrific. JimmieLee just got promoted to Captain. Everyone at the TransFamily meeting was delighted to hear that. Things hadn’t looked good for her recently when the city council voted to disband the fire department in order to get rid of her "legally." Cooler heads prevailed, and some more enlightened people have decided it is time for Salem, Ohio to join the 21st century, face up to it that people do have gender changes, and that some times the best person for the job happens to be transgender.